Date: Sat, 31 Jul 1999 11:40:21 PDT From: Felicia Olivier Subject: And So It Goes (01/01) To: FKFIC-L@lists.psu.edu Here's my answer to Cousin Mary's challenge to write a story where Tracy calls CERK to request a song. Disclaimer: I don't own FK or the characters (and it's a darn shame, too). The song "And So It Goes" is written and performed by Billy Joel and is *his* property. Permission to archive is granted to the www.fkfanfic.com and ftp sites, as well as to any Vaquera, DP, or T&V Packer. SPOILER: Fever. And So It Goes (01/01) Tracy Vetter awakened with a start. She turned towards the alarm and slapped it off. She hadn't slept well, and now that it was finally time to get up, she was exhausted. It was her night off, the first in nearly two weeks, but she had to have routine, thus she woke up at the same time each evening. She thought back on the past twenty-four hours and let out a long sigh. Her shift had been eventful, perhaps *too* eventful. Two murders scenes to examine, two next-of notifications, several witnesses to question, and then there was the paperwork. Her partner, Nick Knight, had been conspicuously absent during the latter, but that was nothing new. After work she had gone to visit Vachon. When she'd arrived at the church he hadn't been home. Tracy remembered how she'd wandered around his dwelling, waiting. Her wandering had led her to his bed. She had thought back to when Vachon had laid in the bed, sick with the virus. She'd sat with him, comforting him, even praying for him. He had finally told her to go, saying that he wasn't going to last another night. She'd left, reluctantly, but not before kissing him gently. It had seemed a miracle when he had showed up at her apartment the next night, healthy as ever. Tracy had known that she'd been given a second chance, and vowed then not to waste it. She had sat on the bed trying to gather her thoughts when Vachon had arrived. She'd jumped, but then, that was normal, too. He'd just given her that grin, and she'd had to laugh. She'd told him she needed to talk, and he'd sat down on the sofa. Her energy had made her pace, though. She'd told him her feelings, how she was grateful for the relationship that they had. "Your my friend and my confidante," she'd said, "and yet I can't help wanting more." She had made herself face him, and continued. "I fell in love when we first met, Vachon. I don't know what that can mean for me, for us, but I had to tell you." Tracy looked in his eyes and saw, what? Pain, frustration, surprise? Even after all these months he could be so unreadable. She'd turned, and heard the familiar whoosh sound that meant he'd left. Now thinking back, she wondered if it was all too much for him. She'd hinted before, but perhaps her candor had spooked him. "Ha," she thought to herself, "the tables are turned. *I* actually scared the vampire!" She got out of the bed and headed to the shower. After letting the hot water pound her for a full 30 minutes, she felt better. A plan was forming in her mind, one last shot. Tracy planned to stop by the church first. She had to see if she'd run him off for good. She dressed quickly and was out the door. When she arrived, she found the church in the same state it had been in the previous night. That is, it was in it's usual state of disrepair. The crate of bottles sat in the corner. Vachon's guitar was sitting in an old chair. Tracy knew that while Vachon had few possessions, the guitar was one thing he would not have left behind. She sighed with relief. Her next stop was the Raven, but there was no sign of him there, either. She looked around, but didn't recognize anyone she knew. She decided to head home, maybe pick up a half-gallon of some mocha ice cream and a movie on the way. It wasn't her favorite way to spend her night off, but for tonight, it would do. Driving home, Tracy turned to CERK radio. She was in a blue mood, and that Nightcrawler guy seemed to fit. As she listened, she realized it was request night. She heard person after another call in and tell their sob story, and finally ask for a certain song to be played. For his part, the Nightcrawler seemed fairly sympathetic to the callers. "Not quite as morbid as usual," she thought. She hadn't called a radio station in years, but decided that it may be time to try it again. ********************************************************************** Across town, Javier Vachon sat in Urs's apartment. He had been so shocked at Tracy's declaration that he had flown without thinking. Urs had taken him in without question. . .for a while. Now, as she sat across from him in her living room, she turned down her stereo and said simply, "Tell me." He looked at her and sighed. He had to tell someone. "Tracy came to visit me last night," he began. "Uh-huh," Urs nodded. She waited, but he was silent. "Okay, Javier, Tracy came to visit, and. . ." "And she told me that she loves me." Urs smiled, until she realized that her master was frowning. "But that's a good thing, isn't it? I mean, you love her, right?" He shook his head. "Of course I do, Urs. But it's not that simple, ya know." "Why not?" "Come on, you know very well why not! She's a mortal, I'm not." "But that's never stopped you before, Javier," Urs reminded him. "Yeah, well, I, um, haven't felt *quite* this way before, Urs. It's kinda scary." Urs rolled her eyes! Men! "Well what did you say to her, Javier? Did you tell her that you love her, too?" "Not exactly." Urs screamed inwardly. "*What* exactly? What did you do?" Vachon turned away from her. "I left." Urs couldn't believe her ears. "You. . ." "Left, Urs, left. I came here." He looked back at her and winced at the expression on her face. From the look he knew he had a tongue-lashing coming. Urs stood up and started pacing. "Javier Vachon, you have done some really dumb things in the last 100 years, and who knows how many in the centuries before that, but this has got to be *the dumbest* thing ever! What were you thinking? Here the woman of your dreams, and don't *even* try to deny it, I *know* you dream about her, is telling you that she loves you, and you just bail. I tell ya what, Jav, she is better off without you. I mean, if you can't see what a blessing she is, yes, I said *blessing*, then you are just blind!" Urs paused to take a breath. "Are you finished?" She turned angry blue eyes at him. "You know, I am. I've had enough. I'm going to read. Feel free to stay here, but just don't come near me for the day, okay? I need space." With that, she stomped off down the hall and slammed her bedroom door. Vachon sighed, thinking, "That went well. Why is it that *all* women bond like that? She barely knows Trace." He turned up the stereo and recognized LaCroix's voice. ********************************************************************** Back at her apartment, Tracy turned on the stereo and tuned to the Nightcrawler. Taking a deep breath, she dialed. The voice answered, "This is the Nightcrawler." "Yes, hello. I want to make a request." LaCroix couldn't be sure, but he thought he recognized the voice on the other end. "Yes, well, what is the song, my dear?" "And SO It Goes, by Billy Joel." LaCroix flipped through his collection and pulled the CD. "I've got right here. Is there a dedication?" "Well, I don't know if he's listening, but, oh, what the heck? Just say it's to J from T, you know where you can find me." Aha! LaCroix smiled to himself. He'd known it was Nick's partner. He'd seen her in the Raven with the Spaniard. He'd heard about her vigil at his sick bed. He knew of his attempts to keep her safe. And now she was dedicating songs to him. This mortal was interesting. She could be a wonderful addition to their community. "Well, *T*, I hope he hears this." "Thanks." LaCroix turned on his microphone and spun the disc. As the opening piano notes played, he said, "This song is to J from T, who says you know where you can find her. And the Nightcrawler *does* hope you find her, J." He flipped of the microphone and leaned back with a smile on his face. Tracy lost herself in the words and her emotions. In every heart there is a room A sanctuary safe and strong To heal the wounds from lovers past Until a new one comes along I spoke to you in cautious tones You answered me with no pretense And still I fear I said too much My silence is my self defense After hearing the dedication, Vachon sat straight up. He had noticed the J and T, but thought them a coincidence. But now, after hearing that much, he wondered. He listened with renewed interest. And every time I've held a rose It seems I only felt the thorns And so it goes, and so it goes And so will you soon I suppose But if my silence made you leave Then that would be my worst mistake So I will share this room with you And you can have this heart to break At that, the tears that Tracy had held back all day fell. She hated to think of him leaving. She wondered where he was, who he was with. The thought of him with another woman tore her up. She struggled to control herself, to keep rational. And this is why my eyes are closed It's just as well for all I've seen And so it goes, and so it goes And you're the only one who knows Vachon's heart nearly melted at the strong emotions that the song conveyed. It was Tracy. It had to be. He sighed. He hoped it was, he was about to make a bigger fool of himself if he was wrong. He launched though the skylight and was gone before the song ended. So I would choose to be with you That's if the choice were mine to make But you can make decisions too And you can have this heart to break And so it goes, and so it goes And you're the only one who knows Tracy laughed at the irony. The words were too true. "You're the only one who knows, Javier." She dried her eyes and shook her head to clear it. She decided to watch the movie she had picked up. She had selected "Animal House" because she definitely needed a good laugh. She put the tape in and settled back on her couch to watch the hijinks of the Delta house at Webber U. She was cracking up at the scene where the new Deltas took their Fraternity pledge when she heard him. "'With Liberty and Fraternity for All' Ha! I love that line." She jumped three feet in the air before she hit the stop button on the remote and turned slowly. "Javier? I. . . What are you doing here?" He moved over to the couch where she sat and knelt before her. "I'm so sorry about last night. I have no excuse. I got scared, I guess. I heard your song." She again fought back tears. "I looked for you at the church and the Raven. I couldn't find you." "I know. I stayed on Urs's couch last night. Boy is she angry with me." "Why?" He smiled and took her hand. "Well, it's something about how dumb I was to leave you last night, and that if I can't see how wonderful you are, I'm blind." Tracy smiled back. "You know, I've *always* liked Urs." Vachon sighed. "She's right, of course. I am an idiot." He paused, waiting for her to correct him. She didn't. He said, "I love you too, Trace, I just don't know where to go from here. I've never had this kind of relationship with a mortal." "Well, I've never had *any* relationship with a vampire." He laughed, and she squeezed his hand. "We can figure it out together, can't we?" "Sure, Tracy, together." He rose from his knees and sat down beside her on the sofa, pulling her close and wrapping an arm around her. "Now, hit play, will ya? They're about to sing, 'Louie, Louie.'" End ********************************************************************** Everybody all together, "Ahhhhhhh." Okay, moment over! Comments to: felicia_olivier@hotmail.com _______________________________________________________________ Get Free Email and Do More On The Web. Visit http://www.msn.com