Date: Sun, 21 Apr 1996 03:44:53 -0500 From: Lady Sushi Subject: YUMMIES CHALLENGE: "Does It Have a Chewy Center?" 1/1 I would like to announce another challenge: THE YUMMIES CHALLENGE. Over the past month or so, we've had Uncle in an edible grape-flavored thong, chocolate body paint, Nick as the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man, and Nick as Lady Godiva (complete with chocolate). (Note: Some of these you WILL NOT get unless you're on SKL.) So it hit me, why not write about all this stuff? What kind of tasties would YOU like to see Our Favorite Vampyres in? No, it need not necessarily be perverted, although I have a feeling most will. So the challenge can get more publicity I am making this story fairly tame (note to Knighties: After tonight, I will no longer live in Oklahoma. Please send objects of destruction to Zordon, PO Box 3.1416, Gamma Centauri System :) ). So I bring you the first installment of The Yummies Challenge... "Does It Have a Chewy Center?" Susan "Sugar Rush" Schaefer (c) 1996, S. Schaefer feel free to post, archive, burn, or fill with raspberry num-num. usual disclaimers here part one of one "Oh, Nick, isn't it great? Hershey, Pennsylvania!" "Whatever you say, Nat." He rolled his eyes and tried not to gag on the thick, bittersweet smell. How could humans stand this chocolate stuff? Nat continued. "I'm so glad we could get a tour after dark, and of the actual plant!" Through her rose-colored contacts she didn't see Nick going paler at what she considered a heavenly scent. She breathed deeply. "Smell all that chocolate!" She slapped Nick on the back in a friendly gesture. He made a googy (tm). She still didn't notice. "The tour's beginning in a minute. We'd better move." "Okay." He was speaking without using his nose. She looked at him. "Need a Kleenex?" she joked. Nick shook his head. His only vacation this year. How did he let Nat talk him into this? Oh, yeah. That's right. She'd promised not to make him drink any protein shakes for a month. Right now the protein shakes were sounding pretty darn good... "Come ON, Nick! We're going to miss the tour!" "Okay, I'm coming, I'm coming." He allowed himself to be pulled away. Why couldn't Nat pick someplace more appetizing, like a slaughterhouse? Mmmmm, slaughterhouse. His mouth watered at the thought. A whiff of chocolate and THAT fantasy was kaput. "...And now we come to our vats of melted chocolate. I'm sorry, no swimming allowed." Most of the small tour group laughed at their guide's joke, including Nat. She turned to Nick, noticed he was a pale green. "Are you okay?" He nodded, afraid to open his mouth. A swallow, and his courage mounted. "Yeah, just not used to the smell." Nat nodded. "Okay. Don't worry, it'll be over soon. Just hold your breath." He did, and it was. However, as the tour was ending, Nick noticed that he'd dropped his wallet. "Uh, Nat, I can't find my wallet. I'm going back to find it." She looked worried. That wallet was her ticket to Cadbury's. "Are you sure no one took it?" "Yes. No one was behind us, remember?" She couldn't argue, and he'd had it before the tour began. "I'll go find someone to go with you." "Don't bother, Nat. I'll be in and out in a minute." "Nick--" "Don't worry. Nothing's going to happen." Before Nat could say another word he was gone, lurking the factory floor. _Two minutes,_ she thought. _I just hope there aren't any resistors in there._ Nick held his breath as he scurried about the factory floor, looking for his wallet. He found it, rather quickly, near a chocolate vat. Unfortunately, he was so distracted by trying to keep out the chocolate smell that he didn't notice the large, robotic arm coming for him. He realized what was going on just before he was plunged into the brown mess. "Yes, sir, there's a glitch in the machinery. Something happened with one of the 'bots, and now vat number six is clogged." Henderson heard a sigh on the other end. of the phone. "Great. See what's going on, and get rid of the chocolate. It's probably ruined." "But, sir, that's Cadbury's!" "Yes, I know it's Cadbury's, and several thousand dollars' worth. I'm as annoyed as you are, Henderson. Have you called tech yet?" "Of course, sir. I'll get on it right away." "Good. And I expect a full report in the morning." Henderson heard the click on the other end. She sighed. It was times like this she wished she taken the job at the slaughterhouse... Natalie sat nervously, finishing the last of her fifth hot fudge sundae. "Ms. Lambert?" She looked up. "You found him?" "Yes, but I'm afraid it's not good." "Oh, no." She'd known something would happen. "What did he do?" "Well, ma'am, it was really just a glitch in the machinery. I don't know how he survived to be honest. One of the robotic arms swung down, grabbed him by the coat, and plop!" Nat nodded, wondering what the man was talking about. "Where is he?" "Right outside." He turned around. "Wheel him in, boys!" Nat went from worry to hysterics in approximately three point one seconds. There, on a dolly, stood Nick. Covered in an inch of pure milk chocolate. The stuff had blobbed up on his head and butt, and his eyes (which somehow were clear) looked about five times their normal size. From withing the chocolate shell she heard him yell, "Get me out of here, Nat! I HATE chocolate!" "But, Nick," she laughed, "you're too cute like that!" Yeah, yeah, yeah, he knew. The Cadbury's Easter Nick. Complete with ears and tail. He just couldn't WAIT until the 96th got a load of THIS. THE END, lame, cheesy, but the end. I'll do better in JADFE. Cousin "Susan" Phoenix * Camera Fanatic of the Thong Throng Charter Unnamed * Member of the Cold Shower Sisterhood * SKLed phoenix@ionet.net **Faciemus ut Dewus Mountainus e Tuo Nasone Exeat!** "Hey, Marines! The Chicago Cubs suck!" ~~ The Chigs, S:AaB