Date: Fri, 20 Oct 1995 08:20:02 -0500 From: Julie Randolph Subject: Inside the Mind (Uno of Uno) (fwd) Here be Inside the Mind again for thems of you whos didn't get it the first time. Basic Disclaimer--this is one of my popular and grandiose experimental FK-fictions, written entirely in first person narrative. If you finish the story and cant figure out whom the narrator is (or the friend for that matter) then I have done my job. The narrator is not necessairly me. I'd probably give the friend award to Chandra ;) Keep on truckin you FK mongers, you. I'm actually standing here at this door...well, not a door actually, it looks like an elevator. In this dump? Oh well, whatever. Oh say, how are you? I guess it's kind of stupid for me to be standing her like a lump, eh? Yeah, well...what can I do? A friend of mine, you might know her, Nat Lambert? She's a doctor, really good at it too, at any rate,she has asked me to stop in and check on this guy, a friend of her's I'm going to assume. Said he was phototrophic or something and she wanted me (of all people) to make sure he was drinking something or other, a...hang on I have it written in my pocket..phasticoacidic maltin shake? Anyone care to tell me what that means? So that is why I am standing here pressing incessantly on this doorbell/elevator button. the guy must sleep like an elephant if he can't hear this. I can hear it and I'm downstairs. Okay, we are getting somewhere,here comes the elevator. Shouldn't he have asked who I was or something? Maybe Nat called him? Probably. I guess you want to come with me,huh? Well, what the hell, come on, let's go. Yes well this place is...erm...pardon me while I try to think of something polite to say. It's dark, and ummm, dreary. Oh sheesh, who is that? Can't be him, can it? My...my...my, I would say that Nat has good taste in friends. He must be, what six feet tall, I guess his eyes are blue although from this distance I can't really tell. He's coming down the stairs..heh, he looks like a little kid. His hair is rumpeled and he has the definate imprint of a matress on his face. Good looking guy. You just hang tight while I get this over with, okay. I can't really understand the necessity of my getting up before dark anyway, Nat knows my hours. Ugh...maybe she's trying to turn me into a day person (god forbid). You're probably wondering how I know Nat, huh? Well, I guess it was about a year and a half ago, she found me on the roadside. I wasn't hurt or anything, but I had managed to fall into a lot of mud whilst trying to rollerblade in the dark. She took me home, like I said, nice lady. Anyway I suppose I owe her this favor. Did he just speak to me? help me out here, I was zoning. "What?" "Nat called and said you were coming, what can I do for you?" Oh and he smiles, so the zombie has facial expressions, how fascinating. "I am here to make sure you are drinking your uhhh....damn, forgot again, something long and scientific, I hope you know what I'm talking about." "She sent you all the way over here for that?" "I have the distince impresion she had ulterior motives, although I cannot at present tell you what they are." "You have an accent..." How nice ofhim to notice, not like it's BLATENTLY obvious or anything,"Yes, I do." "Where are you from? Forgive me, please sit if you like?" "Okay if my friend here sits too?" he smiles again, damn one might think he was actually a cheerful person. From what Nat told me, I didn't get that impression. "Sure." "Thanks." Okay, what do you think? Should we usurp that couch or sit opposite one another. You probably want to sit next to him, huh? I can see the drool on the corners of your mouth. I'll sit in the chair. "I'm from Yorkshire, England, down in Toronto to do a book signing." "really, for what book, maybe I'll pick it up." "It's a fan fiction about the show Forever Knight, ever watch it?" What? What did I say, why does everyone here look suddenly pale? "From time to time." this time, I smile, he seems uncomfortable for some reason. Can't imagine why,okay, albeit I look like the slacker from hell right now, but I clean up nicely, really I do. So whats wrong with you, you like your about to blow chuncks. Forever Knight, it's a TV show, you've watched it, I know you have, you drool about that guy, er,m...whathisname...oh...oh shit. I'm smiling again. I have just styepped into the twilight zone, and if I'm not mistaken this is Nick Knight...the VAMPIRE??? "fantasy or reality," Oh, did I just say that out loud...maybe he didn't hear me. 'What's fantasy or reality?" Perfect, he did hear,"Erm...just a general comment, not a whole lot of thought behind it apparently. Well, its been a pleasurebutIreallyhavetogonowpleasedodrinkyourprotienthingiesandN atwillbeso muchhappierseeya." I am rambling, that is true, but frankly, it did not occur to me when I came here that I would have to be in the same room with a vampire. I have thought from time to time that vampirism would be interesting, and now I'm thinking, nah. "No wait." Oh sheesh. How do you not turn around to a voice like that. AND would you get up please and stop staring athim like you just won the lottery, we need to go. "Yes?" "You know about me." Somehow, I get the impression that that was not a question and it's making my skin crawl. What do I say now? Know what? You know, my cause would be a lot better if you would get up and come with me. "Uhm......" Well,that was brilliant. He's shaking his head. Oh gheesh, he's going to kill me (and you too so GET UP!!!) "I'm not going to hurt you, how did you find out?" "Look, dude, I'm just a messenger and an author. It really isn't my fault if you resemble the character on Forever Knight, this is not my problem and frankly, your other problem is not my problem either, so I think we're just going to leave now." "I don;t think you understand." Is this the part where he tells me once I know I can never leave again? Fabulous, condemmed to a life of darkness..okay, granted I work at night but I like the day too, I don't scorn the sun or anything...is the sun god mad at me or something. You know, you are not helping matters at all. How can you possibly not be afraid of this...this...creature. He's not even a man for God's sake, he's an animal, with animal instincts and I would prefer to leave with all of my blood inside of me, if you don't mind thank you very much. "I am Nick Knight." Okie dokie...wasn't actually expecting that. Nick Knight, like fromthe book Nick Knight or a strange and weird coincidence. I am hoping freverently for the latter. "And that means...what?" He's standing up, I for my part am hovering by the door. believeme, we just met, if you don't get up and come with me I will leave your ass here, and I am not kidding. "I don't know how you gothere, but you are in Forever Knight?" IN IT? I don't see any cameras, no fake blood, no rubber rats...nope..nope this is not Forver Knight this is a strange and mystifying dream fro HELL is what it is. "What do you mean by, 'in it'" Seemed liek a good question at the time. "Where did you say you met Nat?" "She picked my up out of a mud puddle in the middle of nowheresville after I fell on my rollerblades, why?" He's shaking his head again...you know, I don't like that,it makes me feel more like prey than I already do, however...evil thoughts now start passing through my mind...as long as I'm here and the chances are good this will be over when I step out the door, at least I can tell him a few things. try not to have cardiac arrest, okay. "Okay, I am stading before Nick Knight, vampire-cop, isthis correct from my current point of view?" "Yep." I am now smiling. You dont look like you appreciate the tone of my smile at all, comeone, aren't these the things you've always wanted to say to the man and never ahad the chance until now? Get into it. Quit shaking your head at me. "Great, mind if I let you in on a few things then?" He pauses...oh, maybe he doesn't want my input,"Okay." ":You're a putz, man." He looks mildly shocked by that revelation, although I don't know why, seriiously, the guy wanders around seeking mortality he will never find for what? I don't know exaclt...maybe I'll just ask him. And would you stop looking like I've just run over your dog. "Your show has no consistency,and if you ever did find the cure, it would be over, isn't that true?" He's shuffling his feet and walking towards his fridge,"I suppose so." "So what's the deal with you and Natalie, huh? No sex, I guess that can put a strain on a relationship." "Well..I." "Well///you do it with everyone else, dude." At that he laughs," I mean serioiusly, for a vampire you get laid a lot." "Well, I'm not the writer, what can I do?" "You're the star, tell them you're sick of avoiding Natalie." "What about LaCroix?" "What? That big Fleur mess...ahh, blowit off. LaCroix made his own decisions, you have to stand up for yourself, you're a wimp." In a flash he is standing next to me at the elevator...Goed I hate vampireswhen they do that. He had, for my convinence I guess, "vamped out" and is now basically hovering over me. Hey, look you finally got up, ready to leave now? had enough of the Forever Knight scene for today? Or is it just my incessant andpressing observations? "You think I'm a wimp?" Somehow, after seeing him like this over and over and over, I just can't find it in mysefl to be afraid,"Even as a vampire Nick, you're a wimp. Here's my advice..." "Oh, I await with baited breath." "Yeah, I know you could probably use some dental floss, at any rate, you're 800 years old, perhaps the eldest vampire aroundthese parts save LaCroix, throw some weight around or something. If one has to be vampire, a destiny you chose yourself I might add, and the fault remains entirely with you, you might as well learn to enjoy it." He's gettin irritated,oh well. You finally managed to join me at the door, stop staring in awe, he's just a vampire, sheesh. "I used to enjoy it." 'There is nothing to prevent you from enjoyingit now. Don;t live in the past. Okay, granted the flash backs make that kind of hard, but you can work around them,right?" "Maybe so, but that would ruin the show, wouldn't it?" "Probably." His face has returned to normal. Am I going to have to bodily pull you out of here or do you wish to come on your own? "Well, there you go." "Yep, you have a point. I must run, things to do, people to see, places to go and sleep to get." "You're a night person?" "I keep their hours Nick, it wasn't an offer." "I didn't think that it was...well,this visit has been enlightning...if nothing else." "well, keep the faith (no pun intended) and keep on truckin and you have a long time to truck, don't you?" he shrugs,"Maybe only another season." "Ahhh, well..I'm sure vampires out of work can find something, besides your a millionare, you dont need a job." "But my penance..." Are you coming? I step into the elevator, and I;'ll be damned although droll has now covered the front part of your shirt, you are going to leave with me. Wonders never cease. As the doors close on this strange world on that last thought occurs to me,"Penance is highly overrated." LATER THAT NIGHT "Nat, Nat you here?" Natalie is standing with her eyes pressed to a microscope,"yeah, what?" "Did you send a friendof yours over to my place today?" At that she looks up quizically,"No...why?" Nick smiles to himslelf,"Just wondering." ***************************************************************** Inside the Mind--Julie Randolph all response, confusion, definitions of "irony", strange ephitats, oreos, letters of recommendations or Geriant Wyn davies home address to randolph@tenet.edu Cousin by Choice; Tracy Defender because someone has to. "You didn't have a cat named Fluffy, didja?"--Nick to tracy, Blind Faith *****************************************************************