Return-Path: Date: Sat, 28 Feb 1998 11:06:26 PST Reply-To: Debbie Chilson Sender: Forever Knight TV show stories From: Debbie Chilson Subject: LaCroix's Doubts 1/1 To: FKFIC-L@LISTS.PSU.EDU Disclaimers: LaCroix, Nick and Divia aren't mine. This story contains references to "Sons of Belial" and follows directly after Nick leaves LaCroix in the junk yard in "Ashes to Ashes." No real spoilers here, just refences to things that have already happened. This story also appears in the "Knights of the Cross" newsletter. Someof you may remember my story "Love Conquers All", in which I introduced the "Knights of the Cross." For those who don't remember, or weren't around, KoC is a Christian FK prayer/discussion group that I co-founded back in August. The newsletter is located at this addy, for anyone interested in knowing more about KoC: Permission given to Mel Moser to archive this story. LaCroix's Doubts Part 01/01 "I may even say a prayer," LaCroix said, looking his son in the eyes before turning coldly back to the body of his daughter/mother. As Nick took his leave, LaCroix's mind took him back several months to a time when he had nearly lost his favored child. he'd told Vaderwaal. In part, he'd said it to make the exorcist forget about the existence of vampires, but there had been another reason. He'd made Vanderwaal forget so that no one would remember that he, Lucien LaCroix, had appealed to his son's faith in... "God," he said aloud in the empty junk yard. Yet... what kind of god was it that Nicholas believed so fervently in after all these years? What was this god which had risen up to supplant the gods of LaCroix's youth? How had he managed to stay alive when all others had faded away long ago? LaCroix thought as he stared at his daughter's burning corpse, Before him, his daughter--his precious Divia--was being devoured by the angry flames of the fire he had started. He'd loathed doing it, and watching her die at Nicholas's hand had been all the more painful for him. Despite what had transpired between them, she was his only true child, and he would always love her. How had it happened? How had the precious, innocent child that Selene gave birth to changed into such a creature of evil? Where had the sweet babe gone that once he cradled tenderly in his arms? Divia had been his only real joy, and he would have given his life to Vesuvius gladly if only she had remained as he had known her. If Nicholas's god truly existed, could he have prevented such a thing from happening to Divia? Would he have saved her precious soul from the ancient vampire who had stolen it from her? If Nicholas's god was the one true god, did he not have the power to destroy the evil that had consumed her? This god, however, had done nothing--nothing to prevent Divia, or LaCroix himself, from becoming a creature of darkness. "God," LaCroix spoke again. "If truly you exist, then why have you allowed these things to happen? Nicholas's faith in you is so strong that, at times, I find myself wishing I could believe. If I am to believe, however, I must have proof. Where is it? Where is my proof?" He closed his eyes, willing the painful memories to haunt him no more. The events of the past few months leading up to and culminating in Divia's death had left him feeling cold, empty, and alone. In his sudden despair, Lucien LaCroix came to know doubt. The End Debbie Chilson (Fleurette)fleurettebrabant@hotmail.com NA, Cousin, Vaquera, Valentine, IB, Celtic Glow Worm http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Rampart/1958 Co-founder *les chevaliers de la croix* (KoC) KoC Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Rampart/1282